What's really important

I just watched the Obama speech about the terrorism attempt on a airplane on Christmas day. I found a few things amusing about this:

1. When he was speaking about the incident and what was being done about it he was stumbling and kept on saying "uh." Yet then he gave a flowery speech where he pretty much said nothing that meant anything and it was flawless.

2. My mom was watching her soap opera. When this interrupted it, she fell asleep. Sorry, Obama  and national security, you are not as interesting as Stacy carrying someone else's baby.

3. As the news reporters were introducing it they described the attempted plot by the terrorist by saying the he had explosives in his underwear. I think that sounds funny without explanation.

Another overpaid CEO

Saturday morning as I was eating Cheerios before work at 6 in the morning, the thought occurred to me that Santa is kind of creepy. What lead me to this conclusion was wondering what is Santa's job is actually. His main thing is delivering the toys on Christmas Eve. Other than that, he doesn't do much except for supervising those elves. This though, means he is nothing more than an over-glorified delivery man. Which is the creepy part, I mean, I don't  let the UPS man come down my chimney. 

Furthermore, the elves do all the hard work, and Santa takes all the credit. I think we should start sending milk and cookies to the elves. The little people are always overlooked.

My not so big adventure of the day

We put up our Christmas tree last weekend along with other Christmas decorations for our house. There is this one little ceramic Christmas house and I am quite fond of it. My mom hates it and even though I took it out she put it back and sent it up to the attic with all the other Christmas leftovers when I wasn't looking. I was mad, but she told me I could go up to the attic and get it if I wanted to.

Today I decided I would go get that house. So, I pulled down the ladder, got my flashlight to work by throwing it on the floor, and climbed up most of the way. It was really dark. I could see some of the Christmas boxes. Then I heard a clicking noise. I stood there for about a minute trying to decide whether or not I should go rummaging through those boxes. The clicking noise continued. I didn't want to end up with a FML story about some animal attacking me in the attic. Needless to say, I climbed back down and I still don't have that house.

Like a celebrity marriage

Well, my plan to blog almost everyday has offically ended. It didn't last very long. Oh well.

The problem is; my life is too boring, so I have nothing interesting to write about. True, that a really creative person could make something interesting out of anything, which was my intention, but I'm too lazy to do that. And whether not I could actually do that is another story, but we don't need to discuss it because it might hurt my feelings.

Good new though- winter break. Fuck. Yeah.

Pardon my language.

Modern elves

This is what I do when I'm bored and/or putting off writing papers.

Note that the button on the far-right elf reads "Team Santa."

brrrrrrrr.... *shiver* *shiver*

It is too cold today. It's so cold that I can't even think of a way to end the thought, "it's so cold that."

I went the long way to all of my classes today to stay inside as much as possible. Yes, community college has its perks.

Part of the problem is that I'm too much of a sissy. A couple of times I went outside or forced myself to sit  by a door hoping that it would make me more tolerant to the cold. It didn't work. It just pissed me off. So now, not only am I still a complete and total wimp, but I am also mad at weather.

Don't be hatin

Today at work one of the ladies rolls in and I see she is covered in snow. I normally don't talk much, but I was trying to make an effort so I said, "Oh, is it snowing?" Then her jaw drops and says, "You did not just ask me that!" because she was obviously covered in snow and it was therefore a very dumb question. Then she passes me and I can hear her repeating what I said to everyone in the office. "No, an angel just threw up on me!" she offered as another alternative to snow that could have been a reason for me to ask that stupid question . The second time I heard her tell someone; I got frustrated, and I was embarrassed, so I shouted back (I could hear them even though I couldn't see them) "I was just trying to start a conversation!" She then says that she knows and she was just picking on me. I'm glad you can laugh at my expense, evening staff of Harper's ADS. 

Hell week

My brother used to refer to band camp week as "hell week." It was the week before school started and it was dedicated to sweating in the hot sun learning music and formations. It was hard at times, but it was also fun, so I never thought "hell week" was appropriate.

This week, however; is the week before finals at school. I have about a million and one things to do. If something causes me to go crazy; it's going to be this week. I'm going to actually have to put forth effort and do homework because everything is due this week or the beginning of next week.

Don't get me wrong though, I'm still gonna be on Facebook and MLIA. If there's one thing I learned in high school it was how to be lazy and productive at the same time.

Christmas shopping done

I just saw an advertisement online for a company that makes personalized underwear. At first I thought it was stupid. But underwear is one of those things you can be as crazy as you want with because no one (or a select few [or not so select- I don't judge]) will see it. Since I was already thinking about underwear because of a MLIA that said something about "what's the point of wearing rocket ship underwear if one one is going to see it," I thought, hmmm... underwear...everyone wears it (more or less). Embrace the opportunity?

Therefore, I hope everyone enjoys their "I heart Gloria" thongs for Christmas.

Despite the color; Cheetos are nothing like carrots

I get asked a lot about how the vegetarian thing is going and even though no one who asks me reads this (all those in favor of me to stop mentioning how few people read this say "I"!), I thought I would tell YOU anyway.

I've never liked meat much because of the taste and because of the dead animal thing, but it still is hard just to stop. I do get a taste for it sometimes. Then I remind myself of the poor animal who had to die and I'm back.

In terms of nutrition, well, my mom always bugs me when I am left to make food for myself, for not eating well. I tell her it's not because I'm a vegetarian; it's because I'm a teenager and I love junk food. My dinner tonight was just going to consist of applesauce and easy cheese on crackers, so I threw a salad in there too. I'm not going to lie though, I'm getting sick of cheese quesadillas, vegetable soup, and vege burgers.

Yesterday, my muscles were hurting, so then I looked up "protein deficiency symptoms." Whoops. Other than that...it's going well.

Not the candy

Monday before my professor arrived for calculus, those of us who were there were just waiting around in the hallway. I overheard a couple of guys from my class and they were actually talking about math. Which sounds nerdy. And it was. But these two guys aren't real nerds. They sit near me and I've seen their test scores. They are just nerd wannabes, pseudo-nerds.

Though one of these guys came up to me in the cafeteria one day when I was eating lunch and starting talking about the quiz we had earlier that day (I still don't know his name). He even had a copy of it because he asked the teacher for it afterwards. Personally, I didn't give a shit about the quiz. So, even though this guy isn't all that smart; I think he has nerd potential.

Give your thumbs a break

Today someone was texting in the bathroom stall next to me which I found weird. You don't have to hide to text in college, so it doesn't make sense to go to the bathroom just to text. But it doesn't make sense to text when you're doing your business either. You seriously can't wait three minutes until you're finished? What is really that important? Plus, that's kind of unsanitary if you think about it.

Also today, I was glad to see people who were walking stop to text. I'm glad I'm not the only one not coordinated enough to do both at the same time. As am I glad that these people are concerned about their safety and others' around them. I would totally walk into a pole. Actually, I would do that even if I wasn't texting.

Follow me

What did I do yesterday, you ask. I got a Twitter. Why did I get a Twitter when I implied the other day that I don't like Twitter? Because I'm a hypocrite. And because I was bored. And because my bff does it- and so does Bo (guilty smile).

Twitter is weird though. It was pretty much designed so people could stalk you (your mom, celebrities, etc.). I was watching a video on it yesterday about how to get started and it mentioned that you could make your account private, but that you shouldn't because that goes against the concept of ANYONE being able to find out what you're up to. Ok, it didn't say it exactly like that, but that was the main idea I got from it.

In other words, Twtiter is a great place for stalkers. It's a good place to start if you're a new stalker or enhance your stalking even if you're a pro.

So, stalk me! I mean follow.

Don't need a sweater; he's hot

Last night topped Disney Land- sorry band friends, but last night was my bff's b-day and we saw Bo Burnham. We got there early and we were the second group of people in line, which translates to, we sat in the first effin row. It was amazing. We even got splashed on by his water. After the show we waited to get our CD's signed and get our pictures taken with him. Is it creepy that I printed out my pic and taped it to the wall above my bed? I feel like a giggly pre-teen, but last night was AWESOME!

You don't want the truth

So, I've had my facebook for over a year now, but I still have issues with this whole status thing. I never know what to say. It's harder than it looks because you don't want to sound stupid or boring. You have to think about it. Some people always have witty statuses and I wonder if they sit there thinking about it or if that just comes out because that's really what's on their mind. I, on the other hand, have to think about what to make it. Because if I said what's really on my mind it would either be really boring, inappropriate/creepy, or stupid. For example:

Gloria has really bad dandruff and shouldn't have worn her black jacket. Better remember to use that special shampoo tonight.

OR

Gloria is staring at a guy sitting in front of her in class, imagining him without his pants on.

OR

Gloria hopes that guy isn't reading her mind right now. That would be awkward.

See what I mean? This is why I don't have a Twitter.

My excitment is exploding out of a christmas paper wrapped box!

My top 5 favorite things in the world:
1. My bffs -who will be in town Thanksgiving weekend. I can't wait.
2. Christmas - and anything Christmas related will do
3. Shopping - we've been over this before
4. ABC shows (Flashforward, Grey's Anatomy, Better Off Ted)- can't go wrong with ABC
5. MLIA - self explanatory

Well,  at  about12 am a radio station where I live switched over to Christmas music, finally. I have been waiting for weeks. I love Christmas so much and the Christmas songs on the radio is one of the best things about it. You should be warned that from now until December 26, my radio will constantly be playing this station. And I do mean constantly. And finally I get to break out my Christmas decorations for my room. Hence-forth everything will be Christmas-fied. Tomorrow I'm going with my mom to a craft fair. Those things are full of Christmas. Merry Christmas! I feel so merry right now!

Boo!

My Halloween plans went from nothing-to dressing up as a princess and passing out candy- to trick-or-treating with my friend- to going to a football at my high school and hanging out with a band friend. The last three of those things I did.

My figure will be paying for the extra calories, and I was freezing all night after the game, but it was all definitely worth it.

PS. No one is too old for free candy. 

Things I learned from work

1. It is not impossible to be somewhere by 7 am. I know that sounds crazy early, but believe it or not; people are actually awake and working at this time.

2. You always make mistakes. Even if you do everything right.

3. Six years of Spanish class gets you NOWHERE.

4. The more money you make- the more money you spend.

That's all I've got so far.

Squirt gun filled with fruit punch

I went ahead and bought a princess costume today. Not the one I mentioned before, but a still relatively high priced one. That probably wasn't the best decision since I also did not go to work today. That's ok, though because princesses don't work.

I also bought boots and a handful of other essentials (gloves, deodorant, sweedish fish). Again probably not a good decision because I took off work for tomorrow and told everyone I wasn't coming in on Friday, but buying all that stuff still felt good. It helped me break free from the suck fest my life has become.

I see the word shopaholic in my future. I'll take that over other problems that could arise from dealing with too much stress. At least I'll have a lot of nice stuff.

Fish are friends, not food

Some of you know that I have wanted to become a vegetarian for a while now. I had cut back on my meat intake, but it wasn't practical to stop all together since I still live with my parents and don't pay for my own food.

Well, today we happened to watch a video in my philosophy (we were talking about persons vs objects) called "Meet your Meat." It's a video from PETA, but don't let that put you off. As my philosophy teacher pointed out, not listening their argument just because you don't like them is a logical fallacy (which we just took a test on).

After watching this video, I realized that I could not put off vegetarianism just because it wasn't "practical". It's horrible how some (most) animals are treated before they get killed for food. Please watch this video (because I'm sure none of you did when I posted the link on facebook). It's okay to look away at some parts- I did.

Idiot

A lot of my friends are in town from their colleges and decided to get together tonight to go to Laser Quest. My friend, KW, mentioned it a while ago and invited me because previously I had not heard.

If you are unfamiliar with my story, I've had a lot of problems all throughout high school with friends not inviting me to things. And part of it is my fault because I'm shy and all the bad things that go along with that. But it hurts when all of your "friends" are hanging out and you're not.

So tonight I was upset when I saw that KW said on Facebook that she was going to LQ, and once again no one told me about it. I even complained to one bff who has always tried to stick up for me, who in turn, texted another friend and complained to him about it.

Well, a few minutes ago I realized I needed to charge my phone and I see that I have a text. It's from KW. From hours ago. Asking if I need a ride to LQ. FML

Sorry, everyone! I love you all!

Jamie Sullivan, Princess Adelina, Princess Remy?

I like to live in a fantasy land and in my head I base things in my life on characters in books, tv shows, and movies I like. For example, I have a list of goals in my head that are vague and difficult to accomplish just like Jamie in A Walk to Remember. One of my goals is to be a princess. Seriously. I was reminded of this as I was online costume shopping for Halloween. And now that I have jobs, I feel like I could spend the money to buy a costume. Especially one so important that it will help me accomplish one of my life goals (a very important one). So as I was looking for princess costumes I had in mind the book cover to my favorite princess story, The Two Princesses of Bamarre. And I found a dress that was close enough to what I wanted. Now the only question is if I should spend the $60 on it. What do you think? Keep in mind I'm working on Halloween and have no plans for it. But I really want this dress.



The pics:
http://www.fantasticfiction.co.uk/images/n11/n55895.jpg
http://www.costumecraze.com/RNSC55.html

She's in a dress!

Today was a long school day. I was at in class (or would have been if it wasn't canceled) from 8-1:30. Then, I had an hour and a half, like everyday to eat lunch and chill out before work. Then I went to work as a student aide. And not like everyday, I only had to work for an hour. Which was good, but it was raining a little and I had like a thousand deliveries to make all over campus (ok, five, but that's more than usual). But, whatever, it wasn't raining too hard.

Jynx.

Then, I had to go to my sister's cross country meet. I think you know where this is going. I think my umbrella worked harder than I did all day. My sister's arms were numb from the rain being so cold.

Right after that was royal rally, which I wasn't going to go to because of Grey's Anatomy (and it is usually boring), but my sister was nominated for junior court.

Last night was hectic, trying to get her ready for this thing. She didn't have a dress or shoes and she was going straight from a meet to band to having to be in a dress for this thing. I put a lot of effort into it and I wanted to see her. She didn't win, though. Hell, they didn't even say her name. Stupid MCs.

Yeah. That's all I got. I'm tired. I can't wait for the homecoming game tomorrow. Sorry if my posts have been boring. I gotsta work on me writing skillz, I guess.

My week simplified

Just because I know you all really care about what goes on in my every-day life.

Sunday: first day working by myself=not fun, cousin's 5 year old birthday party=fun (princess castle cake)

Tuesday: English class canceled=fun, fire alarm going off twice in one class=amusing, but cold

Wednesday: no classes, slept in til 11:45= very fun

Thursday: English class still canceled= fun, trying to do math homework when I would have been in English= not fun, giving up on math homework and taking a nap= priceless


*through Thursday afternoon

I rule

Right now the two most popular searches on Yahoo are Ellen Pompeo and Wizard of Oz. I think people are finally starting to realize it's all about me. :)

You did not say so

I admit it. I like my community college. Especially now since I'm working there. On Tuesdays and Thursdays because of work and school I'm there for eleven hours, so I get the benefit of being away from my family. I still get the college-ness of walking around campus, chillin out there- I'm thinking about maybe going to the student lounge one of these days. It feels like college. I was afraid is was just going to be like a second PHS-which is what a lot of people call it.

It's not though. And I love the freedom of it all I still get to come home to my guinea pig and my own room (and I don't do my own laundry which is a plus).

So, no, I don't get any crazy college parties, but who wants to get drunk and throw up anyway? I don't.

Run around 'til you're pooped out

I got two new jobs. It's weird because I've never had a real job or really done anything that does not include sitting on my butt, watching TV before.

The first one is at college. I'm a student aide for access and disability services. I have to make deliveries around campus, answer the phone, and do random "projects"- once I put papers in folders for hours and once I highlighted papers for hours. It's easy and really there's not a whole lot to do. I love it. I've meet two other students aides there too and they're really cool.

One of the student aides is so- amusing? She says she's shy, but she's also friendly and doesn't act shy at all. She has all these cute little "boy stories"- once she saw a guy in the building where we work and she was trying to avoid him because they had a class together last year and they would always "look at each other". She freaked out for days because she kept on seeing him there. And guys ask her out all the time (she's pretty) and she like doesn't get it. I said to her one time, "Well, maybe he asked you out because he likes you." and she said, "No, he doesn't like me. I don't know why he asked me out." It's just not what I would expect from a cheerleader.

My other job is kind of sucky. I work four days at college then the other three I spend at this place. I have to wake up early and it's confusing. Two strikes. That's all I'm gonna say about that. I'll give it a couple more weeks. I don't know. We'll see how things go.

Anyways, all this keeps me kind of busy. I haven't even been talking to my friends that much. But school is easy. I have enough time to do homework and I see my friend, DB, twice a week at school- it's nice to talk to her. I don't feel overwhelmed or stressed, yet I've been getting a lot of headaches and stomachaches. Hm.

PS. IT'S MY 100TH POST!!!

How do you get down from an elephant? You don't, you get down from a duck. How do you get out of an elephant? You run around 'til you're pooped out.

Cut the CRAP

Ever since my last class got out today, I've wanted to swear a lot. The teacher of my last class (philosophy) has swears incorporated into his everyday language. I mean, he FUCKING swears the SHIT out of everything! I had to remind myself that I don't talk like that (usually).

I'm really nervous about starting my first job. I feel like it has taken so much for me not to be so F-ing shy (sorry, residual) and I'm sick of keeping it up. It's ridiculous because I can't live my life like that. But it's hard to be something you're not. And it's key when the things you're not, i.e friendly and hardworking, are important in the real world.

Ever since my Bff's have gone away, I feel like I have to watch what I say because I don't want to hurt them. And things have been a bit too warm and gooey. It's unnatural. I can't say that I know what it's like to leave your friends and family and I'm sure it has been emotional, but I want to be able to insult them and tell them what I really think. Because that's what best friend's are for. Did you guys notice that too or is it just me? Well, talking to them online today, I tried to get back into that.

Love found

Finally I reconnect with you.
Slender and silver
you shimmer in my eyes

I run my fingers
along your smooth surface
just to remember the feel

Then we start.
I touch my lips to you
and blow.

It's hard
For months we went without
But my mouth on you
is bliss

Deep and moaning.
I feel your low vibrations
resonate through my skin

Tightening my lips
I make you shriek
tone it down
to sweet melody

You sing with every breath I give
I get lost in your sounds

I love being with you because
together we make music.

My flute.



by RS, inspired by this from last year (click link)

Do the math

Babysitting four crazy children for 4 1/2 hours= $50

minus $5 for having your sister stop by and put them to bed= $45

minus $45 for half the cost of a sociology textbook that you share with your brother= $0

factor in injuries sustained from playing football with a 5 year old and what do you get?

$0 and a painful, old lady back* = so not worth it.

*does not included chiropractor visit costs.

When technology goes bad

Earlier today, I read an article on Yahoo about how some guy's oven turned on by itself. But it didn't really turn on by itself, because that's unrealistic. His cell phone ringing turned it on. Apparently, it was because of electromagnetic interference. Or maybe his communicative devices and his appliances are teaming up against him. Or they thought he could use a home-baked meal after a long day of work. You decide depending if you're a glass-empty or glass-full kind of person.

Later, also on Yahoo, was an article about iPhones and iPod Touches exploding. Which, chill out, is a very rare occurrence, but a few people have been injured.

Now, maybe this is God's way of saying we have too much technology and it is ruining our world (just a contributing factor things like too much garbage and unhealthy ingredients are also involved). And this is the warning that we should go back to simpler times. Or maybe we just need better stuff. Because scrolls and abacuses ain't gonna fit in my backpack

Denial is not just a river in Egypt

This summer has been a roller coaster. A mostly downhill one. There was the ear surgery, and not being able to do stuff like swimming, playing in community marching band, and going on carnival rides. I didn't even think it was possible to have a summer without swimming. There was also that whole dream-crushing thing- you know where I was supposed to go away to college then reality slapped me in the face. Most recently, is the not-getting-that-job-I-really-wanted thing (ok, I don't know for sure, but it's not looking good).

Though the summer was not completely sucky. My favorite day was probably my birthday. I figured that's the only day I could force my friends to come shopping at the mall with me all day. It was the best b-day/ shopping spree ever. I also thoroughly enjoyed going to the zoo with my friends and multiple sleepovers.

Those who know me, know that I hate endings. I cry every December 26th. But I don't feel emotionally attached to this summer. I feel numb. School's tomorrow and I don't want to go. But I will and you have to just keep on moving. And my friends are leaving this week. But, that's life and they got to go. I guess being in denial and being emotionally detached is my way to save myself the tears. This summer has been hard enough. And I can only take so much. With my friends leaving and me going to a school I hate, I have nothing to look forward to. It's the only way I can save myself from myself.

Snippets from my head

It's funny that it was pouring rain on the unofficial but highly participated in white-shirt day of band camp. The humor mainly stems from the fact that I'm not in band camp this year, but my two annoying younger siblings are.

G-force is a good movie, but it was hard to watch. If it wasn't fictional I would cry out animal cruelty. I wanted to pick up those pigs up and cuddle them.

I had decided to be sad tomorrow because it was my almost move-in day. I could have had my freedom. But I thought I'll be happy for my friends if I hang out with them.

Eye throbbing feels weird. Make it stop. Though not as bad as a couple of days ago when my right hand was shaking and I couldn't drink a glass of water or use it on the computer. I'm glad that stopped.

Walking around community college to find my classes yesterday was weird. My English class is in a biology classroom and some buildings smell like a hospital.

Taylor Swift has many songs that I like. But wanna know what's a great song? Glitter in the Air by Pink. Love that song.

I am way too tired for 11:52 pm. Wake up!

They're dropping like flies

As of last week, friends starting leaving for college. It's so weird. I can't believe everyone is going away! All those friendships we made in high school-disbanded. Well, not really. But it feels like it to me. But maybe it is for me. I'm not very good in social situations, or at making friends. And now everyone is leaving me. And I'm back at square one. I'm lower than square one actually. I mean, how many of my friends am I actually close enough to stay in touch with? I'm afraid to know.

I think what will be the worst is when my two best friends leave. I can't even imagine that. I kind of think that should be against some sort of law. Me and my two bff's are going to be in three different states- now that's just not right.

Friends-wise, it's going to be hard for me to stay here. I do have friends going to community college also, but I rarely see these people outside of school. And the only person I know in any of my classes is my brother.

I miss you friends! I wish you all weren't going away! But good luck and have fun with your new and exciting experiences of college.

And don't forget about me just because I don't have a web-cam.

Maybe I should wear my brown pants...

I am so nervous for Monday I could shit in my pants. Not really. It's an expression. And it goes with the title, in case you haven't figured it out by now.

What happens Monday, you ask? Well, calm down. Of course I am going to tell you. Wouldn't be much of a blog post if I didn't.

Monday, I have my first job interview. To most reading this, it does not seem like a big deal. You have already done this and been working for years. I, on the other hand, have wasted the past two years of my life watching TV and playing on the computer. I knew I needed a job, I just didn't want one. I filled out a few applications, and continued to "search" for open positions, but honestly it was "searching" more like how my friend has been "searching" for her "lost" glasses, if you know what I mean.

What I'm most nervous about is that I'll say something stupid. For example, it would not be a good idea to mention that I dread talking on the phone since the job requires talking on the phone. It also would not be a good idea the mention the fact that I am the laziest person I know.

The only good thing is I bought new black dress pants. My previous ones didn't fit and they didn't close. One embarrassing situation avoided.

Protecting my identity

I don't know if you have noticed, but I changed my name. Rodent girl was something I thought of when I couldn't think of anything else and no one read my blog. Now, for all two of you who read it regularly, you get to see a different pen name. Not that it matters much.

I constructed my new alias based on my two favorite fictional female doctors. "Remy" from Dr. Remy Hadley from House. and "Stevens" from Dr. Isobel Stevens from Grey's Anatomy. Also known as Thirteen and Izzie respectively. And (insert chimes and bright, flowy colors) Remy Stevens was born. I'm their love child. JK.

I picked this name because both characters are hot and smart. That is all I aspire to be. Plus, I love House and Grey's Anatomy.

I'm going to dig myself into a ditch

To be honest, I'm pretty bummed about this whole community college thing. It really sucks. I mean, I was sooooo close to getting out of here. I could taste the freedom on my lips. And now, I'm stuck here, in this crappy house, with my annoying parents and siblings (*cough* sister *cough cough*).

This kid I know, who's 18th birthday is today just wrote a blog post about turning 18. I confess I spaced out about half-way through (something about marijuana?) , but that's partly because it started an argument in my head.

He said that turning 18 is unimportant and if anything it's more sucky than being 17 because of new responsibilities. I disagreed I've been 18 for five days and I think it is the coolest thing ever. It's more than just porn, cigarettes, and lottery tickets- it's knowing that you could do stuff if you wanted to. Like getting a tattoo. Bill, the aforementioned blogger, is getting a tattoo. I myself have been thinking about getting one. I don't know if Bill's parents approve of this or not, but mine never would. I find satisfaction, though, in the fact that they have no say in the matter. So, what do you think of a small orange flower on my back, by my shoulder?

But then again, living at home for the next two years limits my would-be freedoms. My parents' house- my parents' rules- as much as I would like to deny that. When my brother, who's a year older than me, started community college last year his curfew got moved up to 2am. A good freedom if you ask me. Won't do me any good though. One of my only friends staying home has the strictest parents I know (yes, worse than yours, Rosie). And neither of us have our licenses. And she lives on the other side of town.

I really could have used that freedom and independence you get when you go away to college. This house, my parents, my siblings (younger) are suffocating me.

Plus, I've already screwed things up with community college seeing as how I can't sign up for any useful classes because they're all full and I got my online account disabled. I was just trying to find out my e-mail address so I could join the network on facebook.

The worst part is all of my friends are going away. They feel sorry for me and try to sympathize, but in their heads they are saying, "Whew! At least it's not me! I'm glad I get to get away from my parents" So, go head. Go to college and party with your cool new college friends. I'll just stay at home, listening to my little sister bitch and insult me to no end.

Sorry, this was a pissy blog. I'll try to get a happier one in eventually.

Bye Bye Birdie

My parakeet just died. We knew this was coming. She had been sick for a while. Her name was Baby.

I first got her after pet-sitting her for a friend. My friend didn't want her anymore because she had a lot of cats. I knew we were a good home for her because we already knew a lot about parakeets since my brother had one. That parakeet's name was Mike. As it turns out, Mike was actually a girl. Which was good because Mike and Baby were the closest friends. Mike was outgoing and was always trying to leave the cage. He (She, but we called him a he because he was my brother's) would fly everywhere. Baby would only go if she was following him. After he died of foot cancer, Baby was devastated. She never wanted to leave her cage. A while later, her depression wore off, but she still wasn't big on the flying around thing. She was more of a timid bird.

Baby liked to attack the toys in her cage. To me, it looked like she was training for something. She sure showed those toys who was boss. She was also pretty vocal- when it came to screaming at you. There was a time when she wouldn't let me hold her, but she would let me take her out and she wouldn't let my dad take her out, but she would let him hold her. I admit at times I thought she was crazy.

As she got older, the flying thing wasn't really working out. She would fly a little, then fall to the ground. Sometimes she crashed into walls or the TV. Once on the ground, she seemed perfectly content to stay there until one of us picked her up and brought her back.

There was also this one house plant that she became obsessed with eating. It was right next to her cage and she would try to pull leaves in for snacking. We didn't know if it was bad for her or not, but she seemed fine so we allowed her to keep on eating it. Eventually, the plant got too big and got moved to a different part of the house. I think she missed that plant.

When it became apparent she was getting sick, we tried looking for bird vets, but it turns out you have better luck finding gold than finding one in the area. The nearest ones were like an hour away. We never did take her to the vet. Despite, the growths under her arms, she was doing fine. She was playing and chirping and in good spirits.

Recently, these growths got too big and one could tell the hassle of lugging them around was eating away at her. I suggested to my dad that we try removing them ourselves. When my guinea pig was sick and wasn't eating, his teeth grew too long, so my dad bought a tool and did it himself. The bottom of these growths were dark, opposed to the tops which were red. I hoped this meant there wasn't any blood flow there. I thought it was worth a shot since her quality of life had become so crappy. So my dad did it today while I was in the shower. I do regret not being there, to help out and give suggestions. Maybe things would have been different. But, on the one side, she was bleeding a lot. We think she died from blood loss.

I'm glad she's in a better place now. I love you, Baby!

Life. Is. Not. Fair. part 2

It's one thing when I have to go to community college. It's another thing when all of the classes I have to take to transfer to U of I are all full. I mean I would have signed up for classes sooner, I did as a matter of fact. I signed on for U of I classes June 2nd, because I thought I was actually going there. And haven't I already suffered enough? At this point, I can't even find enough classes to be considered a full time student.

Anyways, as a consolation prize for myself for not going away, I'm going to get a pet frog. His name will be Francisco. After that guy from Elf. "Francisco! That's fun to say! Francisco... Frannncisco... Franciscooo..."

Chocolate cake

It's my birthday! Whoo-hoo! Finally 18. I think I'm gonna go enter me in some contests and maybe buy a lottery ticket.

I had my family b-day party today. After a couple of hours, I snuck out to go to a concert I promised my friend I would go to (my parents knew, it's all my other relatives I was sneaking from). Today, (for it is 1:33 am) is going to be awesome- shopping with my peeps, G-force, and perhaps a semi-spontaneous sleepover.

Also, I wrote an e-mail to my almost-roommate telling her I wasn't going. I thought she would be mad. But she wrote this," I am sorry you won't be going to U of I, unless it is for the better in which I am not sorry but happy. I hope that in whatever you do, you will be happy." That was so sweet I started crying a little.

Blessing masquerade

I have decided to look at this community college thing as a blessing in disguise. I've known all along that, financially, it is the best decision. And finances can be pretty important when you've got your eye on a $20,000+/year tuition for vet school.

So this way I can stay at home, save some money, learn how to drive (I don't care about driving that much, but now that I'm going to be living with my family for another two years it would be nice to at least get away from time-to-time). It will also be easier to get a job with all the college-bound kids going away and everything.

Plus, this way I won't be as upset about leaving PHS because I still get to go to the football games. It will be like freshman and sophomore year when I just sat there with my parents, wishing I was in marching band. And I already told my sister she has to find someone to take me to homecoming.

It's pretty upsetting, not being able to go away. To ease the pain I decided to keep some of my dorm stuff, like the desk lamp and the comforter. Nothing is really as comforting as new stuff. Except maybe best friends :) And the fact that my birthday is tomorrow. Yay!

Life. Is. Not. Fair.

I have been fighting with my parents for weeks now. All along I have been planning to go to U of I. I signed up for classes, talked to my roommate, and bought dorm stuff. However, my family cannot afford college- at all and my financial aid was pretty crappy. Two grants, two federal loans, and one university loan still only covered about half the total cost for a year. But I decided, it would be totally worth it to go and I was completely willing to take out a private loan to the amount of $15,000. Private loans are something to be scared of. Variable interest rates, fees, and co-signers are not things to be taken lightly. So my parents have been trying to convince me to go to community college for the first two years- WHICH I REALLY DON'T WANT TO DO!!! So I was going to go through the grueling process of asking a relative of mine to co-sign my loan for me because my parents' credit isn't good enough. It was a tough decision to make, and I did consider community college, in the end I made a pro/con list, made a system to rate it and in the end the scores were U of I: 7, community college: -3.

Well, today I get an e-mail. One of my grants, provided be the lovely state of Illinois, wasn't budgeted enough money and now everyone with that grant only gets it for fall semester, not spring. And now, with another $2000 left unaccounted for, I just don't see how it's going happen. I'm in tears right now. I really wanted to go to U of I this year. It's going to be like putting a knife through my heart to go head and cancel all my U of I stuff and call the community college. But I don't see how I have a choice.

Purple music

My computer and my MP3 player teamed up against me and destroyed all but one of my playlists. Since I had to wash the dishes last Wednesday, I decided that it would be a good time to re-do them (I hate washing dishes and listening to music is the only way I can get through it).

I don't have a lot of songs. I used about 3 GB out of 8 on my MP3 player. I don't like to buy music. As much as I love it, it's not worth my limited finances when there are things like free radio. So it's hard to pick out songs for my playlists when my choices are so limited and I don't have most of my favorite songs. But as I was making one entitled "Smiles" (songs that put me in a good mood), I came across one song from my not-so-distant past that I love. I feel like if I had to describe myself using songs this one would be one of them. The lyrics are:


Sometimes I get so weird
I even freak myself out
I laugh myself to sleep
It's my lullaby
Sometimes I drive so fast
Just to feel the danger
I wanna scream
It makes me feel alive

Is it enough to love?
Is it enough to breathe?
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

To walk within the lines
Would make my life so boring
I want to know that I
Have been to the extreme
So knock me off my feet
Come on now give it to me
Anything to make me feel alive

Is it enough to love?
Is it enough to breathe?
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.

Let down your defenses
Use no common sense
If you look you will see
that this world is a beautiful
accident, turbulent, succulent
opulent permanent, no way
I wanna taste it
Don't wanna waste it away

Sometimes I get so weird
I even freak myself out
I laugh myself to sleep
It's my lullaby

Is it enough?
Is it enough?
Is it enough to breathe?
Somebody rip my heart out
And leave me here to bleed
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please

Is it enough?
Is it enough to die?
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please.
oh
I'd rather be anything but ordinary p lease.

My whole life has been a struggle to be 'anything but ordinary' , but whose hasn't? So far my life has been exactly ordinary. Efforts to combat this is what leads to the getting weird. As if all of my idiosyncrasies somehow add up to uniqueness. It isn't enough just to love, or to breath, or to die. There has to be more. I want to taste it.

And I want to taste it by going to University of Illinois and studying animal sciences. If I reach my ultimate goal of becoming a veterinarian, I feel as though my life will be fulfilling and I wouldn't be wasting it away. And once I am doing that, I won't be worrying about being "anything but ordinary" because I'll be doing something important to me.

This is a song that speaks to my heart and to my dreams. It's a song about something more, reaching for something more - goals. And goals are all I have in this world.

This song wouldn't fit in my "Smiles" playlist. That playlist is about outward happiness. So I made a new playlist and titled it "Purple". Purple is the color of my world.

And, yes. That is an Avril Lavigne song.

Roomies

I found out who my roommate is today. She friend requested me on facebook. At first, I was a little mad at university housing because when i went to their website it said the assignments wouldn't be posted until the 23rd. After I got over that, I went to check my school e-mail address (which I don't check that often) and sure enough there was an e-mail saying it was up. There was also an e-mail from my future dorm buddy.

I've been putting off e-mailing her back all day. I mean, what do you say to a person you're going to live with next year that you've never met before? So, I thought up some things:


Hey! Nice to meet you (sort of). We've never actually met but I know you're a person and I'm a person. Unless you're secretly an alien disguised as a person, but I'm cool with that too.

Hey! I know we haven't really met yet but I feel like we have because I already creeped on you on facebook. I read your profile and looked at all your pictures. You seem like a cool person.

Hey, Girl!!! I'm soooooo glad we're roomates. College is going 2 b like totally awesome! I soooo can't wait! TTYL!


Yeah. No.

Hopefully, I'll figure something out that won't make me sound weird, stalker-ish, or stupid.

Hypocritical indecisiveness

Recently I have learned how to turn pretty much anything into a blog post. I have so many ideas that when I don't post it's because I can't decide which thing to write about. So here's random posting again.

VBS is over! Yay! Though I admit those little kids grew on me and I'm gonna miss them (except for Little Sarah, the annoying one who cried all the time).

I got to see my old babysitters and their babies the other day because they're in town. I was kind of afraid of the babies since I hadn't been having good luck with children, but it was fine. Those babies are so darn cute.

My 18-year old cousin is in the hospital right now. I'm sure she's gonna be fine, but it's scary that she's staying over there.

After riding my bike to Target- I hurt. However, I do not regret not having my license because I have so many reasons not to. I am a little hurt that my friend says she's getting her license soon. We both took driver's ed at the same time and we both failed it. It was a special thing that we had.

My laptop has been driving me crazy. It randomly likes to switch to battery even though it's plugged in. When I don't notice, it dies. When I do notice I look like a freak shaking the cord and trying to verbally encourage it to work.

I am annoyed at my friends who replied 'maybe' to my facebook invitation for my birthday celebration. Make up your mind. Seriously.

FAIL

I actually did make a preschooler cry today.

I hate little kids.

Too much salt

I don't really have a topic for this post-just randomness from my day.

My sister and I ride our bikes to VBS and she was bugging me because I am so out of shape I can't keep up with her on my bike. Even though, according to her, she ran 10 miles already, then rode her bike really fast home, and I have the good bike. I was dying though. I can't tell you how long it took me to catch my breath when we got there. It took a while.

I volunteer with the preschool/kindergarten group at VBS. It was fun except when I took like five girls to the bathroom. We were in that bathroom forever. To make matters worse, my cousin who is in that group, locked herself in the stall. She couldn't get out. Plus, she spent the whole day telling me she was going to come to my house later and she never did. She lied and I was sad.

Later, my sis and I took our rodents outside. I was anxiously awating the mailman to find out my AP scores. We played catch. "Who gave her a mitt?" was the reaction of my mother. Just because I duck and jump away instead of actually trying to catch the ball? It only hit her car once.

My friend came over with a big, smelly, drooling creature, and a dog too (jk, kendall). My sister and I played butts up. I lost. Three times. But- I got a 5 on my AP psych test- so boo ya!

I ate cottage cheese for the first time today. It was good, but too salty.

Birth control

I have been babysitting for over six years. Little kids are amazing. They're so cute and they're learning things all the time, and it is really interesting to see the world from their perspective. I used to think a career with kids would be a good idea for me because I was really good with them.

But there is a exception to every rule and that exception is the kids I babysit now. They are little monsters. One day in Spanish class the girl sitting next to me asks, "Do you babysit the C*****'s?" "Yes?" "Don't you wanna just shoot yourself?" Well, I thought that was a little extreme, but I sympathized. Then I found out that this girl babysits them every week. Then I'd want to shoot myself. So I replied, "Yeah, [the boy] once spit on my face." "I know, he swears at me all the time!" Um, the boy to which we were referring, just turned 5. She lowered her head and shook it and I shook mine. We were in agreement over bad parenting.

When I told my mom this today, she was like, "And after you babysit them you don't want to be around any children!" That is totally true! Only I didn't want to admit it. Hopefully, the effects will have worn off by the time VBS starts next week. Or else I might make a preschooler cry.

wut up? nm. u? nm.

I haven't had much going on recently so I thought it would be a good idea to clean my room. That was two weeks ago. So far all I have accomplished is consolidating my junk- the stuff you can't throw away but can't do anything with, and dusting my shelves. Overall, I think I have actually managed to make my room messier. And honestly, I'm getting kind of sick of my room. That's ok though because it'll make it easier to move into that closet-sized dorm I'm going to be living in. I'll just add it to my list of reasons why I have to go away to college.

Please don't shoot!

Sorry Ryan for stealing the place where you got your blog template. I really wanted to change mine and this was the only website that worked. If it makes you feel any better this isn't even the one I really wanted- that one didn't work either (just my luck). You should consider it a testament to your coolness.

The death and resurrection of senior year

Today, I finally decided to go through that big stack of papers from last school year. I do this every year to separate the garbage, papers I want to keep, and things that can be recycled (because I'm so green- that's the thing now to be "green").

Going through these papers was like going through last year again. It was kind of teary for me. Last year, was actually a fun year school-wise. Yes, I had to wake-up early for bio, but I learned so much and I found it interesting (most of the time- I did fall asleep once). Talked to my friends even when the teacher was talking, my lab table somehow managed to mess-up every single lab, drank(/drowned) in the fire hydrant of knowledge, got called a "bio hero" on a quiz I did well on- I'm gonna miss this. And psych too- never a dull moment, there was always some random conversation going on, sometimes psych related sometimes not. Calc was a piece of pi (ha), and now that I think about it there was always some random conversation going on here too except the teacher was in it. Even the not-so-great classes were memorable- I will never forget how freezing my survey classroom was, or my lit teacher when discussing the paternity of two characters saying, "she did 'em both!" AP Spanish was kind of hellish, but I'm such a good student I managed to kick ass in that class too.

I'm gonna miss high school.

Cotton candy fingers

Yesterday, despite not being allowed to go on any of the rides, I went to the carnival with my friends. So I got cotton candy to eat while they went on rides so at least I felt like I did take part in the carnival experience. It was bad cotton candy though. I didn't think cotton candy could be bad. I was not aware of the different levels of quality. I ate most of it anyway because I paid the five bucks, and ended up with most of it stuck to my fingers. Couldn't finish it though. I offered the rest to my family. They didn't take my offer of "you can eat my cotton candy, but it's not very good." It's still sitting on the piano.

By the way, it was both pink and blue. The pink tasted better (slightly).

Girls don't put shaving cream on their own faces

My sister has anger management issues. Today, was the second time this week she punched me in the arm (hard) over a stupid TV thing. The first time was because I changed the channel during a Michael Jackson music video and today it was because I was trying keep the volume at a relatively high, but not ear bursting, level so I could hear it.

It makes me mad when she punches me, or hits me, kicks me -whatever the physical abuse may be, but I (usually) don't do anything back. 1. because I'm the better person 2. she's stronger than me and 3. she has this weird ability to not get in trouble no matter what she does that I seem to lack.

Well, today I was sick of it and I told her she better sleep with one eye open because I'm going to put shaving cream on her face while she's sleeping. And as I've already mentioned, I'm a good person and I keep my promises. So, I actually am going to do it. I mean I might change it up a bit. Like maybe I'll just put it on her feet or I'll use peanut butter, but something is definitely going down tonight. I figure I'm going away to college in a couple months and therefore do not care about the consequences. Plus, she deserves it.

I'll let you know how it goes.

If you throw up there, it means you're having fun

Why am I sitting here with my contacts in when they're really dry and bothering me when I really should be taking them out? Because I want to damage my vision in some weird masochistic way. Or because I'm too lazy to get up.

The carnival is coming to my town soon. I've been waiting since it left last year. For the past two years I went with my sister and her friend. It was fun but last year they asked me why I didn't go with my friends. Good question. So I decided then that next year I would go with my friends and we could all throw up together. Honestly, I didn't know if my friends even liked carnival rides. Some people don't. Personally, I find going round and round on machines operated by creepy people to be a source of enjoyment. Anyways, I figured one of 'em would go. 'Cept now my parents won't let me go on the rides because of my ear thing. And the worst part is, I was texting my friend today and she agrees with them! It has been a month people (or will be). Everyone thinks they're a doctor. Too many doctor shows on TV if you ask me (she says sarcastically because she has the TV schedules to Grey's Anatomy, House, Mystery Diagnosis, Untold Stories of the ER, and Scrubs bookmarked on her computer).

First no community marching band and now no carnival. Is it too late to take back the ear surgery?

Whatever. I don't have any money anyway.

I better go take my contacts out. I'm gonna need my vision if I'm gonna be half deaf for the next six months.

You could shoot for the stars, but they would just burn you

At this transition period in my life I was thinking about the future. I considered all possibilities:

• Get a book published or get a story publish on MyLifeIsAverage
• Have kids or have a pot-bellied pig
• Become a veterinarian or watch a full episode of E-Vet Interns on Animal Planet
• Buy a jacuzzi or buy bubbles for the bath tub
• Go to Australia or go to Outback Steakhouse
• Spend my free time doing volunteer work or spend my free time watching satellite TV
• Graduate college without cheating or finish a bored.com escape game without cheating
• Go on an all-day shopping spree with my friends or go on an online shopping spree by my lonely self
• Go skinny-dipping or shower with the door open
• Learn to speak Spanish fluently or learn to speak pig latin fluently
• Meet a famous person or meet my aunt's cousin who played a caveman on the Geico commercials
• Buy a big vacation house with my friends or build a big Polly house with my friends

They all sound like viable options, except watching E-Vet interns, which is no longer on air.

Contradiction season

I just realized that my blogging name is Rodent Girl, yet for my profile pic I have a picture of frogs. It just doesn't make sense. Then I realized it was good timing because of the recent starburst commercials with their contradictions- Scottish Korean, solid yet juicy starbursts, albino lifeguard. "One contradiction eating another!" If you don't know what I'm talking about- you don't watch enough TV.

You can't make me stop

For the past two days, every time I go to my freezer to get some ice cream, I get attacked. Freeze pops, frozen pizza, and that noodly stuff with the meat inside that I don't like, all fall on me and the floor. Then I have to pick them up and start a balancing act to get them back in. By the time everything is arranged, my fingers are so cold I don't even want to touch the ice cream anymore.

After I put the ice cream in my bowl, I have to put the ice cream container back and the irritating process is repeated. All of this just for a little ice cream. It's like it doesn't want me to have ice cream. "You shouldn't be eating this because you never exercise so I'm going to make it difficult for you."

What's the big deal?

The reason for my ear surgery was because I had a cholesteatoma. That's just a fancy way of saying there was debris, like dead skin, built up in my middle ear. Naturally, when I was first diagnosed in January, I started searching the Internet for information. My usual website, WebMd, was kind of a let down (nerdy-me admits to reading articles on there for fun). There wasn't a lot of information on cholesteatomas. And as I searched the world wide web it seemed to me like there wasn't much info on the web at all. That is until I found the Yahoo! group.

Yahoo! groups is a great feature and apparently they have everything from like Dukin Donuts group (called Dunkin' Coffee Table) -"A place for coffee lovers to converge" to the Cholesteatoma group. This was a great source of information. Not only did it have links to many informative websites, but there were also discussions going on and I could read about people's personal experiences.

As I would read these though, it seemed to me like people were way too into this cholesteatoma thing. There were two kinds of people I noticed right way. One, the people who either had really bad doctors or really bad luck. These people had like ten surgeries, each one lasting like five hours, with overnight hospital visits. Seems a bit extreme to me. The surgeon who did my surgery, can do it in like 45 minutes. My surgery, where he also had to build me a new eardrum and repair a whole in my semicircular canal still only took 2 hours and 40 minutes.

Then there are the people who are like way too dramatic. "Oh my god! I have to have surgery! But I have two children!" Chill out. You have some dead skin in your ear, not cancer.

This Yahoo! group is an active group a with almost 1800 members. I think it's great for information to learn about what others went through, but I just think that some people take it too seriously. For months now I have wanted to post there and ask "What's the big deal" But I realized that might be kind of rude and I can't trust my teenager judgment so I didn't.

However, recently, one member decided to make a blog and dedicate it entirely to her long, sad cholesteatoma experience. Really? Can you write a whole blog on that? I read it yesterday. She's already writing about her fifth surgery out of eight and her blog is only a few weeks old. Plus, the title, I Am Surviving Cholesteatoma. Well, I sure hope so! I would think you have a better chance of not surviving the flu.

I understand it freaks some people out because it's happening to their four year old, or they don't want to lose their hearing, or have surgery. But it's not that bad. It's a nuisance, yes. I admit that I hate that I still can't touch or lay on the right side of my face. And it is really annoying only to be able to hear out of one ear, but it is only temporary. And for the people who's hearing loss from the cholesteatomas is permanent they can get a hearing aid. As for the surgery, it's practically an outpatient procedure. I'll give it to the four year olds.

Perhaps, I have exaggerated a bit. Most people use the group for the same reason I do. It's just the obsessive, freaking out, dramatic people who bug me. Someone needs to tell them to chill out.

Anyway, I just wanted to rant about it.

PE shorts make good PJs

I can't sleep. I feel weird saying this because it's all bright and nice outside right now. The sun is out, birds are chirping- actually I wouldn't know if birds are chirping because the air conditioner is on and my windows are closed, but I bet they are. Oh yeah and it's 8:30 in the morning.

I would love to start my day this early, really I would, but as of right now I've already been awake for an hour and this doesn't suit me because I didn't go to sleep until 4 am. So, at 8:20, when I felt that trying to fall asleep would just be wasting my time, I got up and decided to eat a waffle. I thought about watching TV, a common act of the sleep-hopefuls. Except my sister would be coming home soon from early bird running (an act of lunatics if you ask me) and she normally doesn't like people disturbing her "alone time." Being the witchy person she sometimes is (more often than not at her age), I thought I wouldn't bother her. Not because I respect her "alone time" because I don't give a damn, but because I was too tired to argue with her.

Sure enough, 3 minutes after I arrived in the kitchen, my sister came home. She was surprisingly in a good mood. I guess you just need someone to complain to about how hard the workout was and how hot it was outside and how you were doing a hard workout in the heat.

When I went back to my room to blog, my sister followed. I wanted to type, but since she was in fact not being witchy, I talked to her. She told me how she rode her bike no-handed. I was in disbelief over the fact that she could make a no-handed turn. So, we went outside. She got on her bike and showed me and as she was about to show me again, two boys in a fancy car drove by- while I was standing there in my pjs.

We went back inside and my sister still wanted to talk. I wanted to blog- about her- so you can see the predictiment I was in. And in case she is reading this, it was nice talking to you this morning. We should do it more often. Though I'm not going outside in my pajamas again.

She's still getting her "alone time," but this morning she got her "Rodent Girl time" too. And can you blame her? Who wouldn't want to talk to me?

Blogliness

Does my blog look a little off to you? I was playing with it last night because I was bored and would you believe I ended up changing the whole template?! Then I freaked out and changed it back, but I couldn't remember the exact color of some things. So it may look slightly different. You probably didn't even notice. I did change the picture on the title though- that was on purpose. However if anyone remembers what color the post title color was, let me know.

Doohickey telepathy

While I was watching TV today, I became frustrated with the remote. You see, I was watching Scrubs on channel 42. During commercials, though, I wanted to watch something else. It was either That 70s Show on 51 or iCarly 0n 46. In order to get back to Scrubs, I would use the "Go Back" button on the remote. So during the commercial I would flip to 51, but it was a commercial on that channel too so I had no other choice, but to go to 46. The problem is now when I hit the "Go Back" button it goes 51, not 42 Scrubs like I wanted it to.

That's when I decided it would be much better if the remote could just know what channel I wanted it to go to. It should just read my mind. I am still willing to press one button, if it could just do that one little thing for me. Go back to Scrubs instead of That 70s Show.

This whole mind reading thing should also apply to cell phones. I don't have a fancy cell phone- it was pretty cheap actually, and it does not have a qwerty (that was fun to type) keyboard. Also, I suck at texting. But when I went to type "2" in my message, I had to go through "a", "b", and "c" first. Now really the cell phone should have known that when I hit that button I wanted the "2" and not those other letters. Again- one button. I'll manage to press that as long as it can do a little mind reading for me.

You may be wondering, if you are having all these problems, why don't you get fancier things? Go for the qwerty (still fun) cell phone or a TV thing that has some channely thing (IDK)? And the answer is simply I don't want to. Technology is just not advanced enough.

Though I suppose that's good since I cannot even work with current technology. That spinny-ness on Ipods is just too much for me. I need something with a definite click when I push it. Still, we should have had flying cars by now.

Old, but still great in bed

I just told my brother how it's a good thing he got a new computer. His old laptop, which was five years old had stopped working, so when the wireless on my laptop stopped working I borrowed his wireless card because I thought maybe mine wasn't at its peak performance due the fact that I had stepped on it multiple times. Well, a couple of weeks ago I wanted to go on my computer before bed, but it was late and the beauty of a laptop is that you can use it in bed. However, it somehow ended up falling off the bed and crashing on the floor. Needless to say, the wireless card I promised my brother I wouldn't break cracked in half and I was ghettoly using a rubber a band to hold it together. I put my old wireless card back in. It's prettier anyway.

By the way, be careful what you find on the internet because my brother's new laptop also has a web cam.

Play it by ear

Well, I feel kind of detached from reality now and I am ready to jump back in and not a minute too soon. You know it's bad when I'm sick of TV. The reason- last week I had ear surgery.

About this surgery, well, I didn't think it would be a big deal. The ear doctor told me he only operates on Thursdays and that way his patients can go back to work/school on the following Monday. I figure, great, a few days to chill and then back to normal. Even in the pre-op room the resident was like, "What are you doing this weekend?" Um, I can do stuff this weekend, so soon after surgery? It sounded good to me.

When they woke me up after my 45-minute-turned-2 1/2 hours surgery my first thought was I have to throw up. At that point I was still in the operating room- I bet they would have had fun cleaning that up. I managed to wait, throw up twice, then sleep in the recovery area for the next three hours. I felt bad because my parents didn't get to see me while I was sleeping there and it may have been a little my fault seeing as I stayed up until 1 the night before and had to get up at 6:30.

The next few days consisted of me throwing up every time I tried eating something and being so dizzy I had to have someone walk me to the bathroom whenever I had to go. In this lovely time, I also did not shower. By the time (Wednesday) I had figured out a way to wash my hair without getting water in or behind (where they cut me open) my ear, I wasn't even sure it was hair anymore- just a big pile of greasiness. And when I finally was able to eat, I had difficulties because I couldn't open my mouth all the way or chew on the right side, seeing as that side of my face was all swollen and bruised.

So, no Doc, I did not do anything that weekend. I also think that had I had school I would not have gone back on Monday, unless of course they wanted me to fall down three flights of stairs. I know this whole post has sounded like a list of complaints but cut me some slack because they did cut my head open for cryin out loud. And the best part? I have to have another ear surgery in six months. yay.

Rodent Girl Lisa smile

Today was my last full day of classes at high school. Which is well...what?

Last full day of classes means tomorrow I still have half my classes. Which means a test in English. But it also means half of my classes today were the last ones. I was really glad to be done with Spanish. That class was torture all year. Plus, it doesn't help when you don't understand what's going on. Last day of psychology meant I should be sad. It was a great class with a great teacher, but I'm not. All I could think of was "how does the movie end?" Band was a different matter. Yesterday, after I got my marching band uniform dry cleaned, I was like, "It's so pretty [it hadn't been cleaned in a while] I'll miss you uniform." As dorky as that thing was, I liked wearing it. I had a friend who was sobbing in band. That Pomp and Circumstance is pretty tear provoking. Especially, when your not the one playing it (when you are playing it, it's more like painfully annoying).

As I was walking home today, I was thinking about everything. Here I was, backpack on my back-filled with crap from the whole school year, U of I t-shirt on my body, and my graduation gown in a bag in my hand. I was getting kind of emotional. Not to mention I really had to pee, which didn't help.

So, yes, even though I can't wait to get out of this place- I'm gonna miss it.

I'm freaking out about college too. Long time ago, I thought, we don't go to college. That's something that happens to other people and to people on tv. It seems unreal to me- going to college. My older brother went to community college this year and my parents never went to college. I have no one to tell me the secrets. I have no clue of what to expect. It's like I'm going swimming, and I'm about to jump in the water. Except, the water is cold and I'm afraid of fish (I always swim in a lake- there's no other way). And when I jump in, what if my bathing suit rises up or snaps or something (this sometimes happens with a two-piece. Another reason for swimming in a lake- it's not as clear).

I'm sorry for the swimming analogy, but it's almost summer so what do you expect? I never said I was a creative genius.

My point is that today was my last full day of classes in high school and I am sad and happy and scared.

Wait, was that the parade? I think I missed it

Saturday my school's marching band went downtown to march in Chicago's memorial day parade. We had to get there early because the streets were being closed down. So we got there around 10 after an hour long bus ride. The parade doesn't start until 12:30. Okay, we'll just sit here in the middle of the street for hours.

Random gross fact: Shortly after leaving the bus my friend dropped her clarinet reed on the sidewalk- in downtown Chicago. I'll leave it up to your imagination to think of all the things that could have happened on that sidewalk. Then she had to put it back in her mouth.

By the time we finally starting marching it was way past 12:30. I don't even remember what time it was, I was just so glad to leave. Plus I had to pee. When we turned the corner to the actual parade route there were so many people. I probably could have frozen right there. Like I don't have a hard enough time marching and playing at the same time already (I'm not even really good at either of those things separately) .

So we played our three songs, then we played the first two again. Then-nothing. It was over. The parade was over. I think it took us longer to walk from the end of the parade route to the bus than it did to march the whole parade. And after all that waiting.

That's ok, our town's memorial day parade is tomorrow and I'm sure it will be plenty long (and boring).

PS: It was actually a lot of fun. You should be sorry you missed it (especially since it was on tv and you could have watched it).

No, you don't get to see the elephants

Today, I ditched school to go to the doctor. It took a long time, most of which was spent waiting. Well, it just so happened that the doctor I went to is right by the zoo. How convenient. I thought this would be a better way to spend my time than band and Spanish class.

So, after eating a Whopper that left my breath smelling like onions, my parents and I headed over to the zoo. What I really wanted to see were the elephants. It is just my luck that the elephant area was under construction (along with the whole center area requiring multiple detours) and there were no elephants there. Though I suppose I shouldn't complain because I did get to ditch school (again).

Other highlights of the zoo trip include, a little kid crying when the female lion jumped at the glass because everyone was annoying her and my dad getting pooped on by a bird.

It was a lot of fun and I took lots of pictures. Oh, I saw naked mole rat babies too.

Chilln'

I have been finding myself unable to blog recently. I blame it on my boring life, but I've always had a boring life and I used to blog a lot.

One of the problems is that I realized I hardly ever update my status on Facebook. Consequently, I have converted all of my thoughts to short, nondescript, trying to be amusing phrases. Not only has this not helped me become more active on FB, but I can't blog because a one-sentence blog, isn't interesting and that's all that's coming to my head.

The other problem is AP tests were going on and I was very busy not studying for them. There was also prom, mother's day, band concert, and my own laziness. You know it's sad when I'm too lazy to go on the computer. Pressing the power button and typing in my one-letter password is just too much effort sometimes!

Anyway, I have been experiencing the strangest feeling all afternoon. I feel happy for no reason. As a matter of fact, it kind of makes me worried. I feel cheery and smiley, and I had fun doing my psych homework (I like psych, but homework is homework and should not be enjoyable to normal, non-nerdy people). The ironic part is, I attribute this to my psych teacher. Today in class, we were talking about cognitive therapy and she brought up (which she has brought up many times before because we are a class of melodramatic teenagers) the fact that things only seem really bad to us because we make them that way. When this came up earlier in the year, it was because everyone hated that we had to wear our IDs and she was like, "Really? What's the big deal?" So, I guess what I'm saying is that the reason I'm happy is because I'm not letting things bother me. I could definitely name many things that are an annoyance to my life right now, but who cares? Whatever.

I'm an animal person

A few times, I have heard noises at my bedroom window.So, I look and there's a squirrel there eating, chill'n, maybe hanging on the screen. It happens more often in the rain because the roof on my house extends out farther in the front and apparently it's a good shelter. Today, I was sitting on the floor of my room, making jewelery and watching Grey's Anatomy on my laptop. It was raining, but I had my window open. I started hearing these squeaky, chirpy noises, and I was like, what's that? I think it's coming from from window, so I get up to see and two little birdies fly away. Awwwww, little birdies. I felt bad for making them fly away. They could hang out by my window if they want. I like having little animal visitors. Although, sometimes they leave rotting food.

Here's a llama!

Since it has been almost a month with nothing to post about, I'd thought perhaps I'd share some of my favorite things to do on the Internet.

1. yahoo.com often has good stories. There's a lot of really random stuff, but also stuff that usually ends up on the news on TV the next day. Yahoo is also home to Yahoo! Answers. Even if you don't have a question to ask or answer sometimes they are just fun to read. Example- "Can I clone myself and use the clones for spare parts?" One answer- " You better hope they don't use you for spare parts!"

2. lefthandedtoons.com All three of you who read my blog, already know about this site. However, I felt the need to remind you because it is such a good site. I visit it every weekday to see the new toon. My recent favorite is called Banana!.

3. fmylife.com What website is better than this? It is stories of hilarious, crappy things that happen to people just like you (I take that back because some of the people are stupid and bring it on themselves). My favorite I read when I was moderating, but it never got posted. It went something like this: "Today, I was whistling as I walked past my academic adviser from last year. She said 'that's fitting.' I was whistling 'If I only had a brain' FML"

4. Russell Brand Normally, I don't like famous people, but I love this guy. He has everything I look for in a comedian. He's funny, British, former drug and sex addict, and was an English teacher for a year. This youtube clip, my friend showed me, is my favorite, but I would highly recommend watching the other parts too and checking out other videos of him on youtube. I also enjoy his crazy hair.

5. Abc.com The best thing on this website is the FEP. FEP used to stand for full episode player, but then got changed to free episode player- just to let you know how nice they are by letting you watch some of their shows online for free. I usually watch Grey's Anatomy, but via the FEP I recently discovered a new TV show. It's on TV on Wednesday nights, but you think I remember to watch it then? It's just not that important to me. So, in my free time, I go to abc.com to watch Better Off Ted. There are lots their shows online too, like Lost and Desperate Houswives.

Really, there are so many things you can do online. Like virtual makeovers. Seriously, how can you ever be bored with Google? There are also my old favorites- bored.com- you have not lived until you've played all of the escape games, painted your personality, and tested your psychic powers. And don't forget good ol' neopets and this video.

Life is like a box of chocolates...

My neighbors brought over some chocolates for my family and I because I watched their rabbit while they were on vacation. I thought, ok, I'm going to sample these first or else my parents will eat all of them and I won't get any. The first thing I tried- some sort of chocolate hard candy- wasn't that good, but I took a handful to stash in my room anyway. Then I went to the box of assorted chocolates. My little brother warned me that none of those are good and that you always get the bad ones, but I had to try anyway. First one, not bad, not great, but not bad. Second one- ew, blagh! It's grayish insides tasted like gross raspberry (port-a-potty, my sister and I would say because they put raspberry scented stuff in there to make it smell better). Third one- wtf! Straight to the trash. I couldn't even identify the inside of that one. Fourth one looked pretty safe- kind of nutty. That one was good. My point is- life is like a box of chocolates- sometimes you have to spit 'em into the garbage.

PS: Don't analyze the metaphor

I owe one injured duck a huge favor

I was in kind of a bad mood today because it's spring break and I had absolutely nothing to do, so I thought to cheer myself up a bit I would take my guinea pigs outside- the weather was a little nicer today and they like being outside. They were in their little plastic igloos and I also put a little fence-thing around them, which I usually don't do, but since I didn't want to bother with them running away or anything, I did. My sister, who was about to leave for a chiropractor's appointment, came outside and we started to play whiffle ball. All was going well, and I was up to bat. I noticed a man who started walking down our street and I was kind of watching him because I'm a suspicious person like that. Well, apparently, while I was watching the man, my sister was watching what she thought was a duck fight, until she realized it wasn't a two ducks- it was a duck and a hawk. I don't know if you understand the significance of this but hawk+ guinea pigs = dinner. And there it was- across the street and two houses down. It was so close I couldn't believe it. I knew there was a hawk around here, but I had never seen it so close before. So, my sister screamed and I looked and yup, that hawk was giving one heck of a beat down to that duck. I looked away quickly because I had to go save my pigs and frankly I did not want to watch that. As we were picking up our pigs, my sister froze. "Forget the igloos! We have to get the pigs inside!" I said to her. She informed me later that the reason she hesitated was because she thought she saw the hawk flying at us. When we came back outside to get our stuff, the hawk was sitting in the tree right outside our house. Holy Shit.

My sister says she saw the duck fly away. That was probably the moment when the hawk came after us. But think, if that duck hadn't been there, it could have been my guinea pigs- and they wouldn't have been able to fly away.

As much as I love all animals, I'll admit that I want that hawk dead. My guinea pigs get so few pleasures in their life and eating the grass and playing outside is one of them. Now that is taken away from them. I am, however, extremly grateful that my guinea pigs were not a victim of the hawk's hunger. So thank you God, and thank you duck.

My prom dress!

Blondie Nites® Side Ruffle Halter Prom Dress from JCPenny

Now I just need a date. The dress is the easy part.

I need to work on my coiled snake impression

All week I have been taking notes in my head about things to blog about, and, well, I can't remember any of them. It would be nicer if my brain was a computer. Then I could just save my ideas and I would only lose them if I deleted them. Although, I've never had much luck with computers. Today, my computer shut-down on me for no reason. I swear I didn't do anything! Maybe it was mad at me for going for a few days without using it (gasp! I went days without using my computer?! I don't believe it either).

Friday, I went to the Field Museum for AP Bio. It was so much fun! Well, most of it. We had to go through this exhibit called "The Evolving Planet" and Mr. S gave us a ginormous packet to do. Which wouldn't have been so bad except no food or drink was allowed and I was dying of thirst. When we were about halfway through, there was a map on the wall of the exhibit, and when I saw it I was like, "gaaaa! We're only halfway through!" Well, ok, I didn't say it like that, but that's what I was thinking. I was so caught up in my thirst I could barely remember anything past the dinosaurs.

We strolled through the DNA area like we were supposed to and took pictures with Sue before going to the Egyptian exhibit. I liked seeing the mummies.

Then, we went to the animal exhibit. That's where the real fun was. We spent our whole time there taking pictures posing as the animals. We have some funny pictures with everything from Rinny being a baboon to me being a worm. Good times. But we didn't look at the entire exhibit because we had to leave, so naturally, we got lost trying to get out.

Let it snow

I've always liked snow. When you're younger, you make snowmen and snow angels, have snowball fights, and go sledding (no, wait, I did that this year too). But after a while I would get sick of it. It was great for Christmas, winter break, and snow days, but after January it just became depressing and a reminder that it was cold.

I don't feel that way anymore. I love the snow. It's pretty. At this time of year, if we didn't have snow we would just have wind and mud. The snow makes everything look nice. I like watching it come down too. It kind of has a calming effect. Don't get me wrong, summer is still my favorite season. You can't beat green grass and warm sun on your exposed skin, but all I'm sayin is that while the snow is here, I'm gonna welcome it.

Don't Die Izzie Stevens!

Having nothing to do, since I wasn't needed to babysit tonight, I started looking up Grey's Anatomy stuff. And OMG- why didn't I think of this before?! Years of me complaining about how none of my friends watch the show so I had nobody to talk to about it, but there are like a million message boards.

So a few episodes ago, was the whole "I'm here for you thing." To catch up all non-GA fans, Izzie had been spending a lot of time with Denny, her dead fiance (he was a patient in season 2). While Denny was there as a ghost, Izzie was having relationships with him (coitus), which was weird and confusing since she is going out with Alex. So she decides to be with Alex over Denny. After she tells him this though he won't go away. He can't and he tells her "I'm here for you" and that she's a doctor and she needs to figure it out. That episode ends with Izzie figuring it out- she's sick. That's what Denny meant. In case you're having problems with my explanation- dead fiance ghost telling you you're sick = not good.

In the next episode Izzie gets the interns to do tests on her, under the pretense that they are doing it for practice before they do it on real patients. Incompetent intern, Sadie (incompetence proven in next episode where she ends up quitting), gives Izzie her blood test back and all it says is that she's anemic, but the Sadie's real patient might have cancer. An episode later, Izzie is doing a craft project and can't find the scissors which are right in front of her face.

And that's all they say about it! Oh, stupid GA -Private Practice crossover is more important!

People on the internet are saying that Izzie might die. Katherine Heigel has implied publicly that she doesn't want to do the show anymore, and in kind of an insulting manner. This has lead people to believe that the writers are going to kill her off - most likely via brain tumor. However I found this quote from Shonda Rhimes, “I think the love triangle with Denny, Izzie, and Alex is among the most interesting we’ve ever done. Watching the chemistry between Jeffrey and Katherine again has been really touching. I can’t wait for our viewers to see where we’re taking it. But what it won’t involve is Izzie having a brain tumor.” *

Well, that's nice and all, but folks on the Internet are speculating something like, brain aneurysm, or something where even if she doesn't die, she'll be incapable of performing surgery and that will be her excuse for leaving the show. Now, personally I think the brain aneurysm thing is overdone and would not be a good storyline, but what if she leaves the show? Another idea is that maybe Sadie mixed up Izzie's test results with cancer lady. Sounds too predictable to me. Not only would I be upset if Izzie left the show, but I would be mad for them doing it in such a stupid way. Then I discovered this one yahoo answers:

"Here is my guess:
Denny kept telling Izzie, "You're a doctor. You figure it out. You're a scientist." I think that was his way of telling her to figure out that she has some sort of physical sickness, like a brain aneurysm, that causes her to see and feel hallucinations. Remember the episodes with Meridith and Derek's clinical trials? Some of the patients had intense hallucinations. Or even Eli Stone, he has an aneurysm that causes him to have intensely real hallucinations.
I think Izzie finally figured out that she is truly sick. Denny was telling her that he was there for her so that she would stop to think, "Why am I having hallucinations?" He wasn't trying to "be there for her" like a friendly emotional shoulder. He was there FOR her to realize that she was sick.
Again, just my guess."
-lysharenee

After I read that I was like, omg- yes! hallucinations! It ties everything in and it would make the storyline more plausible.

I am so messed-up about this. I can't wait til Thursday for a clue, but it's gonna be another GA/PP one. Congrats to the show for keeping me on the edge of my seat (but in the meantime I'm going to go pull my hair out).

Anyway, I just hope that Izzie Stevens doesn't leave the show. She's one of the mainest characters and the show just wouldn't be the same without her. I would have a really hard time watching the show without her. There have been so many characters added Erica, Dr. Dixen, Lexie, Sadie, ped surgeon who's name I can't recall (and Callie, Addison, and Mark were early add-ons) , and so many who have left- Burke, Addison, Erica, and now Sadie. This show has had so many shuffled characters, which is ok I guess, it keeps it interesting, but at some point we fans just need people to be fans of, and that won't happen if nobody stays on the show. In my opinion Izzie can't leave because it would put a crack in the foundation of the whole show. Plus, the "character shuffling", is a crack, Burke leaving was a crack, ghost Denny was maybe not the smartest idea. I just don't want the show to crumble. I love the show too much. I stood by through all the craziness, and now that the show is back on it's feet plot-wise, I don't want it to fall again.


*http://www.greysanatomynews.com/2008/11/18/greys-anatomy-spoilers-no-brain-tumor-for-izzie-whats-next-for-callie/

Donut wars

My sister's friends told her about a guy in one of their classes who gives them donuts everyday. Apparently, his parents own a Spunky Dunkers and they won't give him free donuts, so every morning he buys donuts from Dunkin Donuts. That's hilarious.

Getting high

I just watched the whole first season of Grey's Anatomy. Which, isn't that bad because it's only nine episodes, but anyway- those characters get high off their surgeries and fancy medical stuff. Me- I get high just from staying up late. I'm like almost addicted. Every Friday and Saturday, I have to stay up late. It's so lame but it's one of my favorite things to do. I don't get tired to the point where I'm hyper (although I admit that's also a fun sensation), but I get really tired and just ignore it. I like doing that- take that, body! You'll sleep when I tell you to sleep! The end result is like when runners push through the pain and get a runners high (leave it to me to compare my extreme laziness to a sport). Plus you never know what you could see on television at 4 am (by that point even the infomercials are interesting). Making myself really tired every weekend, is what I do to relax. I know it doesn't make sense, but it's the only time I get the tv to myself. It gives me a "high" (or you could call it minor sleep deprivation)- without the dangers or expense (cuz I don't have a job) of drugs. If I'm starting to sound crazy right now It's because I'm tired. But I like it.

Senioritis can be a good thing

I can totally feel the senioritis trying to overtake me. Last year, I totally did not believe it. I just thought the seniors were being lazy and stupid, but all of a sudden- bam! It's second semester and it hits you. First semester, it was there, but it was weak. I was able to overpower it. Now it's stronger than ever. It's harder to resist, but I have something to help me- a little fact called, "you need to get good grades because you have to send your transcript to your college at the end of the school year." That motivator is what kept me going. Others though, did not have that motivation because my class rank percentage went from 12.4 to 11- so- boo ya! So, you see, senioritis can be a good thing- as long as it's not happening to you.

Dancing and robots...dancing robots? no, that's dumb

Did everyone see the new Evolution of Dance 2? Well, I have ( a few times actually) because I have nothing better to do than watch videos on the Internet (even though it was finals week). It's shorter but it's still good. You should watch it. And by "should" I mean "open up a new tab right now and come back to my blog after the 4 min 10 second video is over."

What? You didn't like it that much? It's cuz I hyped it up too much for you. Oh well. That's what happened to me Wall E I think. Everyone was like "it's so good" and I was like "oh, I want to see it" and then I saw it and I thought it was so stupid. I think it had potential to be good (it had a good plot), but, come on, it stunk.