Cut the CRAP

Ever since my last class got out today, I've wanted to swear a lot. The teacher of my last class (philosophy) has swears incorporated into his everyday language. I mean, he FUCKING swears the SHIT out of everything! I had to remind myself that I don't talk like that (usually).

I'm really nervous about starting my first job. I feel like it has taken so much for me not to be so F-ing shy (sorry, residual) and I'm sick of keeping it up. It's ridiculous because I can't live my life like that. But it's hard to be something you're not. And it's key when the things you're not, i.e friendly and hardworking, are important in the real world.

Ever since my Bff's have gone away, I feel like I have to watch what I say because I don't want to hurt them. And things have been a bit too warm and gooey. It's unnatural. I can't say that I know what it's like to leave your friends and family and I'm sure it has been emotional, but I want to be able to insult them and tell them what I really think. Because that's what best friend's are for. Did you guys notice that too or is it just me? Well, talking to them online today, I tried to get back into that.