I thought this information should be shared

In my zoology class, everyday the professor says something interesting or at least mildly amusing and I thought "imagine my head was on my rear end" was going to be it for today. But then we went into the topic of flatworm reproduction. You can tell this is going to be fascinating already, can't you?

First of all, for some background info, flatworms are monoecious. This means they have both male and female parts under "one house." So that when they meet any other flatworm, they can get it on. Except with flatworms "getting it on" is a little different. It's called hypodermic impregnation.

In other words, penis fencing. Yes, that's right, penis fencing. Some flatworms battle it out in order to be able to literally stab the other with its penis. You see, flatworms have no vagina-like structure, and this is the solution to that problem. So afterwards, the flatworm is left covered in holes and with its opponents sperm.

I bet you wish you had seen the video. Note: I wouldn't search for this on youtube, just to be safe.

Seasons change; men don't

Why, hello there, Mr. Fall! What are you doing here? I wasn't expecting you for another 20 days! Please, come have a seat. What is that you brought for me, 60 degree weather? I haven't had that in ages! Thank you so very much! Though, I have to be honest with you, Mr. Fall, I am not prepared for your arrival. You'll have to sleep on the couch, I'm afraid. Ms. Summer is still in the guest room. That doesn't trouble you? What was that you said about Ms. Summer? Oh, you fancy her? She has such a warm personality. Yes, she has that too, hee hee. Mr. Fall! Please, watch your manners! I cannot have you talking about using your wind to lift up Ms. Summer's skirts! What would Mr. Winter and Mrs. Spring say! Mr. Fall! Mr. Winter would never use his cold for Ms. Summer's nipples! How dare you accuse him of such an ungentlemanly thing! Mr. Fall, I think I'm going to have to ask you to leave. I can not tolerate that vulgarity, especially while Ms. Summer is upstairs. Speaking of Ms. Summer she should have been down here for supper by now. Well, she probably heard you talking and didn't wish to come down with you insulting her innocence. And no, Mr. Fall, you cannot throw Ms. Summer down into a pile of leaves and have your way with her! I don't care how large her bosom is! Good day, Mr. Fall! *Slam!* Humph!

Snippets from my head #2

I hate child-proof containers. Why would you push down and turn something when you are trying to lift the lid up? I doesn't make sense. These things are so hard to open. I wanted to try some make-up remover that my aunt gave to me that had this kind of lid, but I couldn't get it open. So, I just fell asleep with make-up on and when I tried it again today, I  finally got it open, but I also got it all over my favorite sweatshirt.

At the mall yesterday, there seemed to be an unusually high number of pregnant women. I don't know what was up with that. Speaking of which, one of my old babysitters is prego again with her second child. Her daughter isn't even a year old yet. I'm really happy for them, but seriously all these people need to find something better to do.

My friend has this poster hanging up in her room. Another friend pointed out that if you cover up the football it changes it from an athletic-looking picture to a very sexual picture. The media is sneaky like that. Remember: They know how you think because they made you think like that.

I got 13 hours of sleep last night. Isn't that crazy?

It snowed all day yesterday which normally wouldn't be so bothersome, but on Friday it was so nice out that I wore shorts! And now we have snow and winter coats again! Dear snow, please go away. It is spring now and you have overstayed your welcome. Love, Gloria.