Bruno, a chunky chompers if there ever was one

What? I'm not fat, I don't know where this giant bowl of food came from. -Bruno

Got any treats for me? -Bruno

(Pictures courtesy of my little brother!)

My big boy!

I knew leaving my baby home with my parents would mean they would fatten him up just like they did to my babies, Bruno and Jefe, last year. I guess that's what happens, though, when your daughters go away to college and there's no one left to spoil but the guinea pigs! 

Skype Pic

Three guinea pigs and a hamster

I love this pic because it is of all my babies! My sister and I like to put Quasar and Mr. Party Nugget (the hamster) together because Quasar is curious of Mr. P and follows him around. Which is uncharacteristic for the scaredy-cat Quasar. 

However, Mr. P and Bruno don't get along. When we held them up to each other Mr. P took his little paw and pushed Bruno away. It was so cute that we tried to reproduce that for video, but then Bruno bit Mr. P before we could pull them apart (they were in our hands). But no worries, Hammy was fine. And those two don't visit each other anymore. 

No more baby GP withdrawl

Well after my last post about baby guineas, I couldn't resist going to the pet store to look at some more babies! 

This little guy was hogging the food bowl.

Don't worry though, his friend pushed him out for his turn to sit in it.

Also, I think that black fella in the front there is the same guy from the pic in my title- that pic was taken in May. I hope someone adopts him soon; he seems really fun and friendly! There was a *wittle* baby in there too but he ran into the igloo shortly after I walked up. 

I told my boyfriend I should get a baby pig for my apartment at school since my Quasar is too big now and will be staying at home with my parents for my last semester at school. He didn't think my parents would go for it. He was right. Oh well, I will have three loving guinea pigs waiting for me to graduate in December! 

Baby pigs

Someone I used to be friends with sent me this pic of the guinea pigs at the pet store in my college's town last fall. I love this pic because they are cute babies. Though they are probably big now just like my boys! 

Quasar's audition tape for the track team

My littlest guinea pig, Quasar, lived with me in my tiny apartment last year. I used to notice that he liked to run around his cage which was very small. So I took on the challenge of getting him comfortable to run around my room which wasn't easy because Quasar is afraid of literally everything! But he discovered he loves running around! And it looks like he is quite the little athlete. I mean, look at the way he handles those hurdles, I mean, ahem, desk chair.

Guinea chins!

Gotta love those cute chins! 

Mo' money mo' problems?

Saw both of these on the internet today. Today's economy sure is fun. But to the second pic: boo fricken who. Some of us really are screwed financially. Why do we live in a society that tells us we have to go to college to make a decent living, but college puts us in debt for 25 years?

"Old Economy Steve" 

I am a nice lady!

So this texting conversation just happened with a guy who I thought was my friend:

Him: I have edible glitter be jealous lol

Me: Now you just need a stripper to go with it


****wait for it****

Him: How much do you cost? Lol

DID HE JUST CALL ME A STRIPPER? WTF.

I can't believe he just called me that.

Because I am a depressed pessimist who is also bored, I decided to go to grouchyrabbit.com, and look under my favorite category: "Signs that things aren't going so well" and pick out ones that apply to my life:

Your best friend was made at a Build-a-Bear Workshop.

You have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of your life, as long as you die tomorrow.

You're watching porn for the plot.

TV shows are the only thing scheduled on your calendar.

A poke war is your idea of a good time.

You were about to share this on Myspace.* 

*Blogger, but close enough

The Internet people have all the answers

So, I have no idea what I'm doing- ever. Consequently, I will take advice from pretty much everyone. Especially advice on boys because I am totally clueless when it comes to boys. At my 21st birthday party everyone was giving me their drunken dating advice.

But just a few minutes ago, I was reading comments on Reddit and I saw one that I think is going to be my new motto when it comes to boys: 

"Seriously girls I don't even understand where the fuck is your problem. If you wanna have sex you walk towards a guy and say: "I wanna fuck". If you wanna have a relationship just walk towards a guy and say: "Hi". If you fail on one of the given opportunities, do it again. Will work 9 times outta 10. The other one is gay."

I think the problem with girls is, that we really don't understand that guys really are this simple. The other thing this comment points out is you do actually have to go up and talk to boys in order to get what you want from them. Sitting around at home on Reddit ain't going to do anything. 

I also like this comment because you don't have to worry if it doesn't work out, because well he must be gay then! Or at least you can tell yourself that. Then move on to the next guy, who's probably better anyway. 

It's all downhill from 21

I guess I'm old now. How did I reach this conclusion? Well tonight I was so bored that I decided to give my old Game Boy Advance a go. That's right, people, Game Boy Advance, an old one from my childhood. Immediately into the start of "Mario Cart Super Circuit" I realized one thing that would make playing difficult, well besides the fact I suck at any type of video game-- the screen is waaaaaayyyyy too small and dark! This didn't bother me so much as a young'n. Granted, it must have bothered me some because I used to have a light that I purchased separately for my Game Boy. But today, after about 15 minutes of playing, I was done and my eyes were watering. So, I guess that's that. I have old people's eyes.

So pass me my cane and my hearing aid. Oh wait, I do have a hearing aid. Damn. 

Aaaaannnndddd we're back!

Hey blog readers! Or in this case probably nobody, seeing as how nobody will know I'm bringing the 'ol blog back. So hello nobody! It's like last night when Jimmy Fallon put on his show with no one in the audience, oh Hurricane Sandy, you.

So much has happened since May when I last posted, I won't even bother trying to get you all caught up on my life, it's boring and you wouldn't want to know anyway. Let's just get back into talking about random shit like I always used to do anyway. But since this is just an intro post to get back into the swing of things, I will give you a list of things that are on my mind recently:

1. Remember when I brought up what would happen if there was a tornado during the tornado siren testing? Well today the apartment building across from mine had their fire alarm go off for realz 30 minutes before the fire drill was scheduled. They were standing out there a while...
2. Puppies! My friend took in two stray 6 week old puppies, aren't they just so freakin adorable? I had been spending a lot of time over there playing with them, but not recently because said friend is roommates with my ex-bf (see point 3). 
3. My ex-bf is the biggest ASSHOLE I have ever met. He is such a horrible person. He acts like a nice, friendly guy, but don't be fooled because under all that he is just an annoying, immature, mentally unstable DOUCHEBAG who always smells like butt. On a related note, I am currently accepting offers from people to beat him up for me. 
4. Halloween is tomorrow! I'm dressing up as Fran Fine from The Nanny, going to the bars, and hopefully getting the shit scared out of me at the Haunted Forest. Good times. 

Don't say awww

I got new guinea pigs and they are the cutest things ever! They are little babies (3-4 weeks old). They are very talkative, especially when apart. They are brothers/litter mates. They are always pushing each other around, going under each other, taking the other's spot, and trying to flip the other one over- what little stinkers! Them seem to have a "can't with with him, can't live without him" attitude about each other.   But they are soooo small and soooo cute. Jefe ("boss" in Spanish) is the brown one and Bruno is the white one.

It's going to be a fabulously gross summer

Put on my flowered scrubs again today to go volunteer at the animal hospital. I was nervous to go back because, let's face it, my memory sucks and I figured they would expect me to remember how to do stuff. Which they did, and I totally didn't remember. Plus, they expected me to so stuff that they didn't realize I hadn't even learned last year. Guess they didn't realize they had me mainly doing cleaning and office work last summer.

But of the few things I learned over the course the whole summer last year I think I did them all today and then some. I was all like cleaning exam rooms, doing laundry, restocking, preparing vaccines, restraining dogs and doing cytology stains.

Though, the restraining didn't go very well. I was holding the dogs how the vet tech told me but I think all the scratches on my arms and chest are good indicators that it was insufficient. The embarrassing part is that they were small dogs.

I also got to see the grossest thing I've ever seen: an abscessed tumor on a cat's mammary glands. The skin around it was all black, it was big and puffy and pink, and it had a hole in the middle that bled continuously.

Although I haven't the slightest idea how their new computer system works, despite being taught, I'd have to say today was a good day for me at the vet clinic. And back there on Wednesday!

Awkward moments on the bus

Doesn't there always have to be an awkward moment of the day? The answers is yes, yes there does, whether you want it or not.

This morning I got on the bus and it was crowded so I had to stand. As soon as a seat opened up near me I took it because my hands were starting to hurt from the death grip I had on the bars in the bus due to my lack of balance. Well shortly after I sat down, two people moved to stand in front of me. I don't know what they were talking about, because they weren't speaking English, but the guy looked liked he had a thing for this girl. He was like joking around and leaning towards her, she didn't seem bothered about it because it was obvious they were friends or at least close acquaintances.

It did however, bother me. You see, this guy, who was a skinny Asian man, (whom I did not find attractive at all by the way) was standing right in front of me. I was sitting, this means his crotch was right in front of my face. This guy also did not have the best balance for standing up on the bus. His body kept on swaying back and forth. Now, most people try to control that so they are not moving around too much on the bus, but not this guy. He was really into it. With each sway as the bus paused at stop signs and such he really threw his hips into it. The end result (remember he is standing right in front of me, facing me) was that he was essentially thrusting in my face. I tried to turn my head, but there was no escaping it.  #Awkward. Oh yeah, and since he was reaching up to hold onto the pole, his shirt was raised, so I got to see his need for a belt and his undies. #MoreAwkward

Guess I can't complain though. When we took the bus in Chicago over winter break, it was so crowded that my hand was on some Indian lady's ass the whole time.

Now let's roll around in mud

Have you ever wanted to see the world through someone else's eyes?

Would you settle for seeing my eye dissection lab instructions through the lens from a pig eye?

Close enough, right? 

Come on get higher

Happy Weed Day!!!

I guess it's tradition now for me to have a weed day blog post every year with an accompanying video. So in order to continue the tradition and to not disappoint my readers, I actually had to do some research this year. Last year and the year before I already knew the video I wanted to show you for weed day, but my knowledge of weed-related YouTube videos was limited to those two. So this year I went to YouTube and searched "funny weed songs." You would be surprised how many of those videos were not funny. No, actually you wouldn't. After all the people who made them probably did so while high and in that case I bet they are hilarious! I did find one silly and catchy song that I liked though and, I'm not gonna lie, it's going to be stuck in my head all day now.

Lazy glutton

I always make bad decisions. No matter what it is. Whether it putting off working on a paper by blogging like I'm doing right now or like what happened a little earlier.

For some reason I thought it would be a good idea to eat like four platefuls of spaghetti. I know it's too many calories, but hey, I love spaghetti. And stuffing myself had sort of become a thursday nigtht tradition for me. In other words, I do it all the time, no big deal.

So the spaghetti was all delicious and all. I finished it, talked to some people on Facebook, and since time had passed I thought it would be a good idea to have some dessert: two chocolate marshmallow eggs. After that, I was finally gonna start my paper, so I had to have a caffeinated orange juice beverage so I could stay awake to write my paper.

As I sat there, trying to think out an outline, I realized my tummy was really full. Then I had to lay down. I figured let it all digest and it will be fine. But my tummy ache got so bad that I couldn't even listen to fast songs on my iPod because that made it worse.

Then the feeling of having to throw up started creeping up on me. I tried to fight it off like I always do, with my mantra, "I don't have to throw up, I don't have to throw up." But it didn't work. And as I sat on the floor by the toilet, I couldn't help but to think, "This is much less annoying when you're drunk."

Still haven't started that paper...

Being upset is too many calories

The moment you realize your dreams are completely crushed feels like a handful of Oreos in your mouth.

The subsequent moments feel like a stomach-ache.

So yesterday I found out I got a bad grade on a test in an important class. Before I found that out I still had hope. I had been studying a lot more than I was before, and one exam grade for that class gets dropped and I thought this test would turn things around. Except it didn't, it was horrible, and now I have two horrible exam grades for that class. It's not just any class either, it's like one of the foundation ones for everything I had wanted to do. So this in combination with hormones set off the waterworks yesterday.

It was interesting to experience depression for a day. At the time I thought it was interesting, but I didn't really care. I did really just want to lay in bed, stare at the wall, and eat junk food all day. Which I was doing pretty well in until  friend made me get out of bed (and wouldn't let me eat any more junk food), but I was still just really sad and to him I was slightly bitchy. So, sorry about that.

Yesterday I felt like I had experienced a loss. It was the same kind of deep sadness I felt after a break-up and when Wilbur died (although the pain in those was much stronger). I really feel like the vet-school goal is over. It's not possible for me to get it. It's not going to be possible. So I don't really want my friends and family bugging me about it, I just want to move on and find something else.

Although the depression may linger. I'm still sad, I'm still stressed out about school and the million things I have to do, and tomorrow is Good Friday- Jesus dying is pretty sad.

On the plus side: Titanic and Easter!