Seasons change; men don't

Why, hello there, Mr. Fall! What are you doing here? I wasn't expecting you for another 20 days! Please, come have a seat. What is that you brought for me, 60 degree weather? I haven't had that in ages! Thank you so very much! Though, I have to be honest with you, Mr. Fall, I am not prepared for your arrival. You'll have to sleep on the couch, I'm afraid. Ms. Summer is still in the guest room. That doesn't trouble you? What was that you said about Ms. Summer? Oh, you fancy her? She has such a warm personality. Yes, she has that too, hee hee. Mr. Fall! Please, watch your manners! I cannot have you talking about using your wind to lift up Ms. Summer's skirts! What would Mr. Winter and Mrs. Spring say! Mr. Fall! Mr. Winter would never use his cold for Ms. Summer's nipples! How dare you accuse him of such an ungentlemanly thing! Mr. Fall, I think I'm going to have to ask you to leave. I can not tolerate that vulgarity, especially while Ms. Summer is upstairs. Speaking of Ms. Summer she should have been down here for supper by now. Well, she probably heard you talking and didn't wish to come down with you insulting her innocence. And no, Mr. Fall, you cannot throw Ms. Summer down into a pile of leaves and have your way with her! I don't care how large her bosom is! Good day, Mr. Fall! *Slam!* Humph!

The dead deer is staring at me

When I walked into the zoology classroom on Tuesday, I expected most of my classmates to be there already because I was running a little late, but I wasn't expecting the fine displays of taxidermy stuck on the walls. The only reasons I could think of, of why they were there were 1. The professor thought some decorative touches would spruce the place up and get us in the mood to learn about animals 2. They are there to teach us about animals or 3. They are there to teach us what happens when you don't do your homework.

There are also some live permanent members of the class consisting of fish, frogs, snakes, and tarantulas.They must not be very good students to have been there for all these years. It's like that Spanish-speaking girl who was in my Spanish class, but failed.

We also learned some interesting facts about animals that day. Like there is a kind of millipede that when it gets old can wrap itself in a cocoon and come out young again.  And that most animals spend most of their time inactive and conserving energy. Proving once more how well I fit in with all my animal friends.

If all that weren't enough to convince the students how interesting the class was going to be then the various videos such as the one of the six male frogs all jumping on one female frog, the one of the male seal protecting his harem, or the one of the female praying mantis eating the male during coitus, sure were. Well, I'm hooked anyway (insert fish reference?).

The loss of our dear friend, The Summer

Stage 1- Denial: You keep on wearing those short-shorts despite the science building being as cold as Antarctica. Freezing yourself just to show off those legs that seemed so sexy and tan yesterday in your bathing suit that are now just wasting your time as you struggle to unstick yourself from the chair at the end of each class.

 Stage 2- Anger: I am not going to school. It is a sucky, useless place that just takes all my money. I hate you, school! It's all your fault Summer isn't with us anymore! You did this to her! To us!

Stage 3-Bargaining: Please just one more week while the weather is still nice! You can have a week of my winter break, if you just let me go swimming just one more time.

Stage 4- Depression: You fill your backpack with pencils and your calculator then slump it over your shoulder. As you walk out to your car you note the sunshine, but don't care as you will be stuck in buildings all day. All the things that used to bring you joy: ice cream, tanning, sleeping in until noon, seem to have gone with the departed and you are left with nothing.

Stage 5- Acceptance: Let's face it, you're just waiting it out until next summer. Screw acceptance.

Sea it?

You probably haven't read my post from yesterday yet, but in it I mentioned that I still have one really gross scrape on my leg. I would like to take that back. I no longer think this scab looks gross because, as my mom pointed out, it kind of looks like a seahorse. You think so? Cool, right?

Not that you care

I haven't blogged in a while. So here are a few brief updates from my life:

-My favorite didn't win Last Comic Standing. Not that I voted, but this is America so I still have the right to complain.

-I just got back from Wisconsin. Vacations are nice because you get to get away, but when it comes down to it you're still stuck with the five other members of your family in one room.

-I only have one scrape on my leg, from rollerblading last week, that's still really gross. After that heals, I will only be left with my band-aid tan lines and a strong desire to never go rollerblading again.